am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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