I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
