just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
sex in a hospital.. check
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize