"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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