does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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