brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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