so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
