drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
do herpes really smell.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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