Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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