Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
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i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
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All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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