Texts From Last Night

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  (210): View more from Texas

  Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.

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  (210): Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly. http://tfl.nu/2xxy
  Replies (19) Good night (2063) Bad night (925)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.

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  (516): Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid. http://tfl.nu/hcvk
  Replies (47) Good night (5311) Bad night (864)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.

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  (239): just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried. http://tfl.nu/7tbj
  Replies (16) Good night (5498) Bad night (970)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again

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  (814): I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again http://tfl.nu/580i
  Replies (12) Good night (3190) Bad night (938)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that

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  (940): nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that http://tfl.nu/ymub
  Replies (22) Good night (9567) Bad night (1185)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut

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  (972): oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut http://tfl.nu/kqx7
  Replies (4) Good night (786) Bad night (3410)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.

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  (+44): I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk. http://tfl.nu/9idz
  Replies (22) Good night (3099) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden

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  (617): Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden http://tfl.nu/88jg
  Replies (7) Good night (3956) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.

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  (207): how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me. http://tfl.nu/s06p
  Replies (16) Good night (3812) Bad night (2161)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?

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  (405): Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night? http://tfl.nu/sl90
  Replies (14) Good night (919) Bad night (1532)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?

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  (310): My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here? http://tfl.nu/bu6m
  Replies (5) Good night (2466) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard

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  (949): You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard http://tfl.nu/9s6s
  Replies (4) Good night (734) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML

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  (780): If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML http://tfl.nu/m3i8
  Replies (8) Good night (1645) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.

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  (916): He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying. http://tfl.nu/67jj
  Replies (2) Good night (802) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress

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  (816): I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress http://tfl.nu/wfzu
  Replies (2) Good night (513) Bad night (208)

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