I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
