dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
