In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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