I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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