My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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