I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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