we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize