It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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