That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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