Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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