i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
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