Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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