I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
