ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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