Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
