Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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