I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
