You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
