Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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