You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
