What tipped you off? The sombrero?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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