What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize