I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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