Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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