You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
