so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Barsexuality is the new black.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
