she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Randomize