At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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