none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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