omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize