I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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