chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
