Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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