new low.... made out with someone while peeing
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
