I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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