do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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