I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
