I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
