the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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