I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I fill condoms, not promises.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
