What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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